I was a little nervous about being there as i have had a couple of ‘flashbacks’ to the crash and they didn’t go down well, so i was kind of nervous i would freak out at the track. Thankfully everything went very well, only 5 people knew i was going so there were some very surprised people indeed, people would do the double take when the saw me as i lost a ton of weight and was upright and walking around. At the riders briefing on Saturday i got on the microphone and thanked everyone for everything they have done, i had a lot more to say planned but it just didn’t feel right and everyone was anxious to get racing as i always was.

I was mainly there to help out my good friends Shannon and Segren as Segren was about to give birth at any moment, i had to keep telling her to sit down and relax which was quite funny. It was really great to be back at the track, to be involved and feel useful, and i cant thank them enough for giving me the chance to try it. In the process of helping Shannon i had a steady stream of people asking me for setup and tactics advice which was cool. It also made me realize there was a huge hole waiting to be filled by someone to not only build decent motors but also give setup and race tactics advice.

I have always been very mentally strong, heck that is why i have recovered quite well when they gave me 0% chance of any type of survival at all from my injuries, let alone any type of recovery. At the track i have always been very mentally strong and ready to overcome things that may crop up, i also noticed a major lack of riders being mentally strong at the track, which is very different to being over confident. I made some great gains with Shannon during the weekend but to be honest while we worked on his bike setup most of the gains were mentally. I have already talked with a few people about starting a business to help fill the void, as with everything else in my life at the moment time will tell i guess.

I went down to see the guys and girls at Rocky Mountain Kawasaki where i used to work before the crash to say hi, it was really great to see everyone again. I was offered some part time work which is great, with the economy being slow it actually works out well as i can ease back into working without too much pressure, of course i will have lots of pressure on myself but that isn’t anything new.

So yeah, life is slowly getting back to normal, although i am not really sure what is normal for me anymore as so much has changed.

Like i said, with most things in our lives time will tell.

I have been thinking a lot about what i went through and put people through, but also a lot about being back in New Zealand after nine years away. Sure it isn’t the way i wanted to be back home, but it really was great to be there. I really missed the water and didn’t realize how much until i spent some time around Auckland in the various bays. I know i always took it for granted, the water was always there, for years i had a ski boat, went sailing with friends and work mates from Air New Zealand, and generally just surfed and played in the ocean a lot.

Living in Colorado i guess i put it out of my mind about how great and relaxing the ocean can be. Staying with Mum and Ray at their house overlooking the harbor was amazing, i would wake up and see the water, really cool. I have reconnected with some amazing people while i was back in New Zealand, it was great to see Simon Hilton and Barry Jones who i did my apprenticeship and worked with at Air New Zealand. It was also very cool to see William Henderson again, and the help he gave me with my flights getting home was great. One of the highlights was getting to know my cousin Michele again after not really seeing her for 30 years, of course she went to visit the wrong Aaron when she first came to Rehab Plus which i will never let her live down but it was really cool just hanging out and talking with her. Wendy, i dont know where to start, but thank you.

Megan, all i can say is wow. My sister has been absolutely amazing and it has been great to get to know her as an adult, as we have been in different cities and countries since i was 16. I knew her partner Andrew when he was at university a little through friends, so it has been great to catch up with him as well. All in all the trip home and the care i received was well worth it, and without a doubt it was the right decision, i wouldn’t change it for anything. Next time it definitely wont be 9 years between visits and it was really great to catch up with various family and friends.

So being home is kind of strange, and it will take time for me really to feel at ease. I have been keeping busy round the house doing some weeding in the garden, yeah who would have thought!  It is really great to feel productive again and trying to do my bit to making the house even better than Tedi, Josh and Scott already have.

Being in the garage with bikes and tools and stuff hasn’t worried me at all, i even asked to see the helmet i was wearing and can’t thank Suomy enough for making such a great helmet. I was trying to figure out all my keys, what they went to and went around and unlocked my trailer to check out what was in there. At first it wasn’t a problem, looked through all my tools, all the still new tires in the rack, even looked at my leathers that had been cut off me and still no problem. Then it happened, i saw the rear wheel and swing arm i destroyed and kind of freaked out. I mean i didn’t go running down the street waving my arms above my head screaming or anything like that, it just freaked me out and brought a few things back to me. I knew it would happen at some stage and am actually glad it happened in my first week home and not in 6 months, right now i have no problem going back into the garage or trailer so i am not sure what really happened. Lots of new things happening and i just have to keep moving forward.

Thanks to everyone back in New Zealand for everything you have done, and i will eventually get in contact with everyone back here in the US. It may just take some time but i will definitely keep these updates going.

Aaron

I have been busy planning and booking my flight back home and a huge thanks to my good friend William who is now a travel agent one of the Flight Centre stores in Whangarei. For years i have always booked flights and hotels online but i was actually very impressed at the help William gave us and all the questions he answered for us, and he does this for everyone, something you definitely don’t get just booking a trip online.

My speech therapy is going really well, and finally i have started to notice a difference which is great for my confidence. I go once a week and quite often we record my voice so i can hear it, it is nowhere near as bad as i think is it which is quite an eye opener for me. It’s like when you hear a recording of yourself and you are convinced you don’t sound anything like you hear on tape, so yeah, again i feel like i have got some progress going with my voice.

This past weekend was the first round of the Utah road racing series and a lot of my friends were racing their first race of the season. I don’t follow motorcycle racing now any where as close as some people might think, it’s not really because of my crash, but just because now there are much more important things in my life to deal with. It sounds like everyone i have talked to had a great time at the first round and as usual Brian Whipple got some great shots of all the action.

I have spent a lot of time recently thinking about the past 6 months, how lucky i have been, how far i have come, and the effect this whole ordeal has had on both myself and other people. Thankfully it has not only opened my eyes a little more, but a lot of my good friends have said the same thing. I guess the saying that there is some good in everything that happens, is quite true in this case.

One of the things i have been pleasantly surprised with has been that a lot of people have made the effort to stay in touch. When the accident first happened there were a lot of concerned people and lots of well-wishers which has been great for myself and my family. I have formed a lot of very strong relationships over the past 6 months with the constant contact, but i have also been quite disappointed that people i thought would have stayed in contact haven’t. I know life goes on and i definitely don’t expect people to sit around thinking about me 24/7, it has just surprised me a little at who has and who hasn’t kept in contact.  A real eye opener.

I felt a lot of guilt for everything i had put everyone through, i mean i didn’t hit the wall on purpose even if it was looking at me kind of funny, but for so long i just felt absolutely terrible for what i had put all my friends and family through. In some ways i will always feel guilty about that part of it, but i finally feel like i have been able to take control back of my life and i can move forward. Don’t get me wrong no one else was controlling my life but i just had a very passive attitude for far too long which as you all know is very unlike me.

I know things will still be quite hard for me back in Colorado as currently i have no job and no money, but i know i have some great friends there and that gives me a lot more confidence. Just over 9 years ago i got off a plane in Los Angeles with USD$1000 dollars in my pocket and a dream to make a living racing bikes and while it was a struggle, i achieved most of my dream and 9 years later i was still there. Sure i ended up riding into a wall and messing everything up but hey, now i just have a new dream and i intend to achieve it, it all starts with controlling my own destiny.

Everything else is going well, i am right back into the gym and now i am lifting more weights with my right leg and going for a walk/run every day. I have regained a lot of my lost motivation now so it is like full steam ahead again, i am running further and harder than before and it feels really good to have a lot of progress again. The other day i bought a heart rate monitor, i am kind of a geek and i definitely like seeing how my body reacts to things be it a 100 meter run or just a flight of stairs. Now i have another thing to focus on when trying to get fit and it has definitely renewed my determination get as fit as i can, i will definitely be continuing this when i get back home to Colorado and hopefully will end up being able to run a decent distance so i can go running with some friends.

Today was also great as i saw some people i haven’t seen in, well lets just say a very long time. I saw Colin Wickman and met his lovely wife and daughter today, Colin was more one of my sisters good friends at school but i got to know him quite well so it was great to catch up again. I had a huge surprise also today as i got to see my god mother Jackie again before she headed off to the UK. She and her family were always a big part of our lives growing up and it was great to see her again and the really great thing was that she actually understood me ok.

A lot of people sort of expect the worst when they see me again, i have had friends tell me they would stand outside my room when i was in rehab and be nervous as hell of actually coming in the room. Once they did they were pleasantly surprised with how much better i was doing than they thought and that trend has thankfully continued ever since.  The same thing happens when i talk to people on the phone as my voice can be quite hard to understand even though physically and mentally there is nothing really wrong with me. I have heard some ‘gossip’ from back home in Colorado that at first there were a few people going around saying they heard i was going to be in a vegetative state for the rest of my life which really sucks, but i actually really feel sorry for them that they are so close minded. I will admit that there was a lot up in the air about my outcome when i was first in hospital but i have done nothing but fight to get back to as normal as i can and it is just disappointing that some people would come to such a conclusion without having anything to do with my rehab. If anything this has motivated me more to prove how wrong they were for saying it.

I have had this phrase stuck in my head ever since i got back here and i find myself saying it when i get down about life or i am simply at the gym and need to work harder. At the end of the day i am very lucky to be in as good shape as i am and i will try to never forget that. This past weekend at the second round of the Australian road racing champs a guy by the name of Judd Greedy was killed on the track when he crashed while leading. I knew Judd quite well over 10 years ago and he was always one of those happy guys that just cheered your day up when you saw him. My thoughts go out to his family at this sad time.

I went down to Auckland to the American Consulate to sort out my green card, it was lost with my wallet when i was in rehab and while most everything has been taken care of i was pretty stressed as i couldn’t get back in the country legally without it. The good news is that the American government doesn’t think i am a terrorist and seem pretty legit and they gave me the required papers to get back in, sweet!

I wont be jumping on a plane tomorrow or anything as i still have a few things to sort out and to be honest i will probably wait about a week after i am back to tell anyone as i will need to readjust to being home again. Since we just bought a new house right before my crash and i haven’t even spent a night there it will take me a while to find where my wife hides the coffee, i just hope she doesn’t keep moving it!

Apart from that not much else to report, just still trying to do my thing and recover the best i can.

Hopefully i will have a short movie to post up here of what sort of things i have been up, but you will just have to wait.

See ya!

I wasn’t really nervous even though i am VERY competitive with things like this, and who would have thought, so is my sister!  We got there pretty early but still had about 1 km to walk to the start line, so that would make 7km’s, not that i was counting or anything.

We were waiting for the start of the race down near the back of the crowd and i couldn’t help but notice how many serious people there were there with all the gear and doing all their stretches and getting ready. I though about doing some stretches but decided not to as i didn’t want to wear myself out to quickly. At the start of the race i was waiting for the gun to go off but the guy on the microphone just said “ready, set, go!” and Megan and i turned to each other and just laughed our asses off. I know things are pretty relaxed in New Zealand but come on!

So we take off walking and i couldn’t help but notice that everyone in front of us was running, well they ran for about 100 meters and then started walking, again Megan and i started laughing and that basically set the tone for the entire race, err walk, err stroll on a Sunday for us. We got about 1km in and could hear some people behind us with those fancy running push chair things people put their kids in, our plan was just to stay in front of them but our plan didnt last long as they soon passed us, the bastards!

So we are walking along, cracking ourselves up and the 10km runners who were doing 2 laps started to come past us which was kind of cool. A really good friend of Megan’s Toni was doing the 10km run and as she came by us said yelled out hi, i mean she could have stopped and had a chat but no, obviously running was more important to her, gee thanks Toni!

I have to tell you, some people run very lightly and others are puffing and wheezing and generally making a hell of a racket, i would hate to hear how i run, especially at the moment. So there we are, cruising around and quite happy as we still had one lady behind us and she didn’t seem to be gaining on us at all. The with about 1/2 a kilometer to go down one of the last hills she run past us and then starts walking again, i couldn’t believe it. At first i was like “what a bitch” but then i just found that as funny as hell like everything else that day.

We finished in style by both running across the line and just laughed our asses off at ourselves that we sucked so badly, but then as Megan said, not bad for a guy that was on life support less than 6 months ago. After the run we hung out for a while and got a couple of photos that Megan has already posted up and overall it was a great way to spend a Sunday morning in Auckland. Right now where was my coffee!

Yep, that’s right, my caffeine addiction is back and kicking ass! It was strange being in hospital for so long and not having a coffee, probably being in a coma helped my withdrawl a bit i think, but being at Mum and Ray’s cafe every day has changed that for sure. In one way it is just another step back towards normality for me, and yeah coffee dependency is a big step in my book.

On Saturday i had the chance to have lunch with a really good old friend of mine from my days during my apprenticeship with Air New Zealand, Simon, it was really cool to catch up and meet his lovely wife and kids.

Back in the US as most of you have probably heard about how Fargo, ND is experiencing some terrible flooding which is really heartbreaking as Tedi’s family is there and her older brother has been battling the flood to try and save his house. Hopefully they will be ok and my thoughts go out to those people that have already lost their houses.

I have been trying to run on the treadmill at the gym and while i can run with a bit of support from my arms i could never do it never mind how fast i set the treadmill at. The other day i went for a walk and there is this big patch of grass and as i new the grass would help my leg ’spring’ up more i was actually surprised how easy it was after struggling to do it in the gym. At first i just ran about 10 meters at a time, then 20, then 50 and now i am up to about 100 meters at a time which is great and pavement isnt really a problem now either. Sure i doubt i will be running in the next olympics but it is progress and a huge one to check off as far as i am concerned.

Now i try and go for a run every day and it is getting easier all the time, it takes me about 3 steps to get going but once i am going it is fine.  The strange thing is that at first i was just taking small steps but i found the bigger steps i took and the more momentum i carried the easier it was, and hey, being able to run is important as you never know who is going to chase you. It probably doesnt look very pretty but i was joking around with my good friend Shannon who is still recovering from back surgery about how we could have races, sure it would look like two old men chasing each other around but i am sure we would be having fun.

Last week we went for a drive to a place about 40 minutes out of Whangarei called Sandy Bay where i used to spend a lot of time surfing when i was 16 or 17. ok i didn’t really catch many waves, i more just tried not to drown and catch as few waves as possible. Half the problem was that when i bought my first board i wanted to be cool so i bought a short unstable board instead of a longer more stable board, but hey it looked cool on the car!

I have been going to see a chiropractor lately, i have been to one a lot when i was between 8 and 18 and have a lot of time for them. The guy is actually really good and is mainly working on my neck a lot and i have felt some improvement in the way i feel and even the way i talk which is also very interesting.

People keep sending me emails and messages asking when i will be coming home, i have always said “about 2 months” but i have been saying that for a couple of months. To be honest i don’t know when i will be coming back, i figured 2 months would keep everyone satisfied as it isn’t too far off.

This past weekend my sister Megan had the ‘Round the Bays’ fun run which is a 9km fun run (that’s 5.5 miles for you American’s), it is also one of the biggest fun run’s in the world which is awesome. Megan said 5 minutes after the start gun went off they were still standing the same place so it will give you and idea of how popular it is. I was on the ’support crew’ which was just her partner Ned and i and we basically just turned up to the finish party area, set up an ezyup, hung out, read the paper and waited, and waited and….

No it was a pretty cool day, everyone we saw had big smiles on their face and while a few people had very red faces they all looked very happy and satisfied. There was lots of alcohol for people and a few bands which was cool, basically you just walk or run 9kms and then party for a few hours afterwards, now that is my kind of excercise!

Last week Mum, Ray and i went to see my cousin Michele at Omaha where she was house sitting for some friends, it was a great day and good to catch up with her.

Apart from that i am just busting my ass every day to get as well as i can, last week my physio measured the flexibility of my knee and hip and it is almost back to 100% which is awesome.

I will give an update again next week, i promise!

So here i am in hospital, i still wasn’t quite right in the head, that will become more apparent soon, but i have good memory of it which will make great reading. I was slowly getting used to my ‘tent bed’ but it was hot as hell which was one of the reasons i would ‘escape’ from the inescapable bed.

It would get so hot and uncomfortable i would do what any guy would do, i would strip off the sheets and my clothes. It was great as this practice offered me a lot of relief and hey it was a hospital right, so all the nurses would be ok with it, i mean it wasn’t like i was sharing a room so i couldn’t upset anyone else right?

Well the nursing staff didn’t feel the same way i did, i think some of them got traumatized every time they would come to run tests. After a while i would get asked to cover up so i would, with my hand but that was about it, i mean come on, it was a bloody hospital and i wasn’t embarrassed and it wasn’t like the staff weren’t used it.

They finally asked my wife to bring me in some boxer shorts and the staff were much happier, i wasn’t as i was quite comfortable with nothing on and the covers pulled back. It turns out the reason i was so hot was the someone had turned the room temperature way up and it was actually quite hot, well that’s my story and i am sticking to it!

The gym is still going very well and my physio keeps adding new exercises which is great, i am swimming more regularly now which is great. I worked out the last time i did proper lengths in a pool was when i was living in Sydney and my good friend Brad and i used to go to the gym. It was way too long ago and i was always a real water baby when i was younger, so i might have to keep up with the swimming, as long as i don’t drown before i get back

Last Thursday Mum, Ray and myself went for another great drive. We went out to Kai Iwi Lakes where we used to go camping every Easter with family and friends, i actually learnt to water ski out there which was great and it would eventually become one of the many obsessions i have had over the years. The lakes haven’t changed a bit, sure there were a couple more buildings but it wasn’t really any more built up which was great to see.

We then drove up to the Hokianga harbor for a late lunch which was also great. I am sad to say i have never been up there before even though it was only a couple of hours from where i grew up, it really is spectacular but then most of the far north of New Zealand is.

I had an appointment with the voice specialists in Auckland on Tuesday. To be honest the outcome wasn’t really a surprise to me, my voice had improved lots but it was still a mystery to them. There are all these technical terms that they kept saying but basically they cant do much except ‘wait and see’ so i guess, “it is what it is”

Yeah it is disappointing but i can communicate ok and thankfully life will go on.

Last Thursday was Mum’s day off work so after I went to the gym we went for a drive up north, it has been at least 15 years since I have been up north so it was sure to be an eye-opener.

We drove through the valley where I grew up as a kid called Maromaku and it hasn’t changed a bit, our house on the farm looked the same, as did all the neighbours houses. The school I first went to as a 4 year old had one more building but also looked exactly the same, the trip through Maromaku brought back both good and bad memories. To be honest now the bad memories make me laugh now but as a young kid the were the end of the world.

Next we headed up through Kawakawa on our way to the beautiful Bay Of Islands, we drove past my old high school in Kawakawa and I was surprised how run down it was. The next stop was the Bay Of Islands and to be honest I was surprised at how little it had grown, sure the businesses had changed but apart from the warf where the ferries left from it really hasn’t grown at all. After a quick lunch we headed off to Kerikeri which to my amazement had changed lots, it was always a quaint little town but there is some serious money around Kerikeri which is great to see.

On Friday I got a long overdue haircut, the last haircut I got was a #1 buzz cut from Scott in the Colorado hospital right before i left which was over 2 months ago and my head was basically a fuzz ball which was funny also sucked a lot. Now I was given one simple instruction from my mother which was “don’t get another haircut like Scott gave you” which was funny as hell but I followed it, Scott gave me a buzz cut so it was one less thing I had to deal with which was fine by me, but my mother was a little shocked when she first saw me.

While I still don’t remember the crash or most of the next four weeks in hospital, some things really stand out. The main thing in the hospital was that at first I was hot and bored, but more on the hot thing next time. I was so bored I decided that I would get out of my bed and go for a cruise in my wheelchair, I would do this quite often and just wheel up to the nurses station for something to do. I remember one time when my wife turned up and I was just hanging out at the nurses station and I waved to her and she got the shock of her life. Sure I wasn’t allowed to put any weight on my right leg as it was non-weight bearing, and I wasn’t able to do transfers or even get out of the bed by myself, and I had just had a 6 hour operation to fix my shattered lilac bone, and had 4 plates and 18 screws inserted, but hey I was kinda loopy and thought cruising the hallways and waiting for my wife was more important.

Then they decided that I needed to be in a special bed that had a mesh tent type top that they could close at night to keep me secure, now it just became a game to me. For the first day I tried everything I could to break out but nothing worked, then I figured out that I could just pull the zip apart at the bottom and work my way around until I could escape my prison. Kristie who is a good friend that came to visit, got the blame for not securing the zip properly but it wasn’t her fault, sorry Kristie

At first the hospital staff couldn’t believe how I could get out of the bed, which to me was just more incentive to keep doing it. It got to the stage where it became too easy and they told me unless I stopped breaking out I would have to remain in the tent bed. I was a good boy for about a week and they took the tent bed off for good, they main reason I wanted to get out was that it was as hot as hell but more on that next time.

Take care!